Will you Hate Me - Dawud Wharnsby Ali

             Baru selesai menghabiskan cuti seminngu kat rumah.. Memang hancur la aku.. Aduyai.. Hancur kenapa? Biarlah rahsia. Hilang semangat la jugak dibuatnya. Semalam revise 5 Tahun 5 Bulan. Ada satu part ni yang aku rasa memang betul2 kena la dengan jiwa aku yang kacau. It is always like this. Hari last day cuti kat rumah memang tetiba je dapt tazkirah secara langsung or tak langsung yang memang akn menusuk jiwa la. Kali ni through a novel.

Smile in the two- way mirror of my eyes

I put on my faith like I wear a disguise

You can't see my soul

See the life that I live

Show you the mask of the best I can give

I've hid here afraid like a child behind.

Truth of my thoughts that clutter my mind.

What if you knew about all that I do?

Things that I think,

The me that is true.

Sure. I'll always show people the best mask of me. Selalu terfikir 'if they knew the real me, diorang akan still layan macam selalu ke? 

Would you call me a hypocrite?

Call me a liar?

Would you curse out my name?

Would you damn me to fire?

Would you know what to say?

Or would you just walk away?

Afraid the me I've tried to hide

Would you closely resemble the truth of you that lies inside?

I've been looking for answers since becoming an adult

Not looking for dogma to live like a cult

I've been looking to live,

I've been living to find

Freedom from cages that limit my mind.

'I've been looking to live, I've been living to find, Freedom from cages that limit my mind.' Am I? 

Would you call me a hypocrite?

Call me a liar?

Would you curse out my name?

Would you damn me to fire?

Would you know what to say?

Or would you just walk away?

Afraid the me I've tried to hide

Would you closely resemble the truth of you that lies inside?

Will I scare you, upset you, frustrate you, irate you?

Challenge a lifestyle or weaken your trust

Or will you see my efforts and my passionate sincerity

Would you see just a little of yourself in me

Will you take off your mask so we can both be free.

I really hope that I have the right to say  out loud the this stanza to people that I know for ages. But how much effort and how much sincerity I ever put to be a better me? It was too little that I'm not even dare to say it..

Would you call me a hypocrite?

Call me a liar?

Would you curse out my name?

Would you damn me to fire?

Would you know what to say?

Or would you just walk away?

Afraid the me I've tried to hide

Would you closely resemble the truth of you that lies inside?

The sentences in this stanza are exactly what I'm thinking now.